Saturday, December 10, 2011

Love Story, Maybe

This is a love story, or not. It can be a love story if you want, between Hans and Anna, but it doesn't really matter, because this story ends like every story does: they both die. Don't be surprised; that's how every story would end if the writer didn't quit.

Hans and Anna met at a bar, or ice-cream social, again it doesn't really matter, the setting doesn't really play such a huge part. It's just a mechanism to get the characters together. The bar/ice-cream social was crowded, or empty, and Hans accidentally spilled his drink/ice-cream down the back of Anna's new blouse, shirt, jacket, the details really don't matter because you know, everyone eventually dies, but I'll quit mentioning that. Anyway, they meet, and it's love.

[insert cliched funny movie meeting scene]
“Oh, sorry about that”
“It's okay.”
“Here let me get that.” “Here let me get that.” both simultaneous.
Napkinned hands meet, eye contact.
Sweet, cautious, first kiss between future lovers.
Visions of ranch style homes and vacations to Napa. Not eminent death.

Or maybe it was that other cliched scene, if you want. Again, this doesn't really matter, I mean, everybody ends up dying, it's pointless really. No, stay positive, life's not just a fleeting series of awkward moments accentuated by alcohol/ice-cream. It can't be; that would just be cruel. Is existence just a cruel series of unfortunate revelations? Stop thinking like that. Here's the other possible scene:

[insert cliched angry movie meeting scene]
“Hey, bitch. Watch where you waddle that thing.”
“Fuck you, short dick. It's fucking crowded in this bar/ice-cream social, watch out.”
He points finger, she hits it away, eye contact.
Hard drunken/sugar-high make-out kiss.
Imagery of clasped wrists and neck biting. A little death. I mean, you know they're going to die, how can you not think of it? Cause everybody dies in the end...damn it, okay I'll stop giving away the ending. Sorry. But you don't know how they die, so keep reading. It's of old age. God damn it.

Let's just start fresh.
There's these two high school kids: Jodie and Nicholas. They die in a fiery car accident. Fuck! Sorry. Back to the original story it's almost over:

They have a sweet/angry, passionate/sex-fueled, kiss/tongue hump. It's good/adequate, and they quickly exchange phone numbers because Anna's there with her boyfriend/girlfriend who happens to be in the bathroom/outside fucking a midget—again, these details are trivial, it's just stuff placed for plot convenience—at the time and she has to get back.
Hans and Anna never saw one another again, and died roughly 60 years later.

The End

See it was a twist ending after all.   

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